Are You Part Of The 45% Or The 23%?

0:00 Good afternoon, good evening, good three twenty six am, and you have woken up suddenly because you had a dream about peeing the bed, even though you're almost forty two, and it takes you a good ten minutes or some kind of hazy variation thereof, to decipher whether or not you did, in fact pee the bed. You didn't pee the bed. In this scenario, we are anxiety attics bedtime Stories. I'm Joe and I'm Morgan, and welcome to our. Welcome to our weekly BS where Joe can't talk, where we Morgan and I discuss about let's discuss about I'm losing my mind today more I can't talk. I think you're perfect. I can take over.

0:42 What do we do? Joe and I discuss the deepest, most intimate parts of our brains and we're just joking. We just bs and we just really love having this community to talk to. Wait, Joe's looking at me like you did not do it better job than I could. No, I'm sorry, I am read. I'm rereading my jumping off point for today's BS, and I didn't mean to not look interested working on No, but I don't have resting bitch face. I have resting. I'd rather be someplace else and I'm paying attention to something else. Face. Well, that's the shittiest thing you could say to your friend that you're staring at right now.

1:26 No, I think that's just what my face says. That's not necessarily what I'm doing. Oh, that's fair. I would like to say. We were just discussing the anxiety of dreams the other day, because I had a funny dream about you, Joe, that I told you about, and you kicked me out of your house because it was actually a spa. But anyways, the dream of having a paper do and you're back in school, and I've had this recently where I have like a fifty page paper and I just remember my dream that it's due the next day. I'm still a forty three year old woman with kids, you know, in the dream, and I'm so stressed, Like how did I not think about this? And that same anxiety of when I was back in high school or college where i'm you know, working on the homework assignment or whatever it is, it comes back to me and it takes a good thirty seconds when you wake up to be like, oh my god, thank god, because I didn't even know anything about I don't know. I can't remember what it was in my dream, but let's just say it was like the medical implications of having a toe amputated.

2:28 Yes, but you need you need to actually come down because the adrenaline even though this, even though the situation is fake because you're dreaming, the adrenaline's real. Yeah, I'm not the situation is not fake because when you're in a dream, the situation is real. But yeah, it takes you a minute. But when you wake up, but when you wake up, you realize it was fake. But the adrenaline is real, like you're really still responding to. It, totally, totally so anxiety inducing it And I can only imagine that if you dread that you wet the bed, that would also bring me back to when I used to win the bed. I mean, oh margs. For me, it was mostly this like irritation of am I gonna have to change the sheets?

3:12 Like it went. It went from. It went from a bad dream to like irritation of reality real quick. But my I would say though for I don't have the I don't have high school anxiety dreams. I think because they've been I think because I'm so good. At getting so worked up and anxious. And I had a career for a long time that like induced a shitload of anxiety. I think I just got to replace it with like things later in life. With something else. Yeah. No, I still get the whether it's a work assignment or study assignment. And I wake up and I go, oh my god, thank god, that was a dream. But Joe, I know you were looking at your kicking off point. You found this because it was on your alerts, right, was a Joe Newman?

4:01 Yes, so I got an alert which I do often, and it's kind of sad because it is from the Pittsburgh Creation and Funeral Care. And this was Joe Newman, who was born in nineteen twenty three jo or jo no woman Josephine. I like Josephine, Josephine Catherine Cryanne Newman. But she died at and you know what's funny is she was born in Springfield, mass which is pretty close to over Morgan and I grew up. But what's interesting is she died at one hundred and two. And I look at that and I go, like, first of all, good on anybody who wants to stick around on this planet for that long and I don't, so I googled how often average Americans think about death?

4:54 And my AI overview. Says that a study by Insurance News Net. Because that sounds so reliable. Doesn't that sound like such a deeply factual toturse. Yeah, yeah, you can put it in your notes after you study for your thesis. It sounds like that's like a Wikipedia. Yeah, totally. It found that forty five percent of Americans think about death at least monthly, and twenty three percent think about it daily. I think there's a big jump from daily to monthly, but you know, Insurance News Net, you get after it. Yeah, what about like five days a week? I mean week daily? Is that a thing? Yeah? Or bi weekly instead? Yeah, anyways, this is stupid.

5:38 They jumped on one day to once a month is a big jump totally. And I was like, Okay, how often am I thinking about death? And I would say that it changes, like there's definitely times if something bad happens where I'm thinking about it a lot more. You know, as we have aging parents and you know, I have a you know, I live with a lot of animals and we just had to go through this with one of our horses. So I'm like, oh no, I'm I'm part of the twenty three percent to think about it daily and thinking about Miss Josephine Catherine Newman, I was like, one oh two, Nope, no, thank you. That being said, I mean, you could ask me at one oh one, but like, I don't think so.

6:24 I even tell my girls, like, do not make life commitments before the age of thirty, because you're. Gonna live till one hundred. You really want to be with your significant other for seventy years. Now that I think about it, I my husband was smart because he didn't get married until he was well into his thirties. I didn't wait until I was thirty, and I might regret it a bit. Well, there you go. And then and then if you're coming of age, when our children are coming of age, you're gonna have to regret it for a really long time. At least now you're maybe in that millennial gray zone where you're not necessarily going to have what do they call them, like ultra longevity, ultra lifirst what do you call people who live a really long time?

7:07 I have no idea, but what, Joe, this is the question I wanted to ask you what's your ideal age that you'll kick the bucket. Okay, So mine is not an age. Mine is a physical and mental state. I want to go, go, go, go, and then I just. Want to drop dead. I don't want a slow burn. I don't want I mean, look, it's not like I'm like checking off the ingredients I want on my subway sandwich, heir. But if I could wave a magic wand and have it be however I want it. I want to be able to go hiking. I want to be able to ride horses. I want to be. Able to be outside, be active, be engaged with people.

7:47 And then one day just have it. I'll be over like I don't want. I don't want a life where I'm physically or mentally incapacitated in any way. That's my ideal, that being that I have, I have, you know, zero control over where my life is going to go or where the world's going to go. And I guess I'll just have to cross that bridge when I come to it. I that would be That's how I think I want it. At forty at almost forty two, that's how I think I want it. So this is gonna shock you because I don't think that I'm the one who would have this fear. I feel like maybe you would have more of this fear. But the fact that I will die one day and in two generations. I'm gonna say two generations because obviously hopefully my kids and my grandkids one day, if there are grandkids, let's pretend there are, will remember me. But after that I'll just be like, oh, great grandma, who maybe they'll never meet me, so they won't remember me.

8:53 In two generations, my name won't be uttered anymore, right, Like, nobody think. Of unless we unless we kill it with these books and a TV show on this podcast, and then maybe they. Will so so yes, I'm saying, this is why it's funny. Let's pretend we don't have a podcast, because I've been thinking about this since like high school, and I go, nobody will utter my name again, Like all the stresses, all the anxieties, all the happiness, all everything I've done in less than probably seventy years will not even there won't even be a trickle of remembrance or a thought. Right, This is why I think we've talked about this before.

9:42 This is why the movie Coco so resonated with me because in the I don't know if it's just Mexican culture or South American culture. You your body totally drifts away from heaven once the last person gets rid of your photo. Do you know when we talked about this, we talked to about this with Granny's picture that's in your house. Yeah, and I love that idea to keep them, frame them and have like a little corner where their picture is always present to, you know, keep it going through generations. Yes, and I don't mean famous, I mean leaving something behind, That's what I mean. Yeah, Yeah, but it could even be as much as memories that are passed down, like storytelling. You know, maybe they'll tell the story about when I glued my eyes shut.

10:33 Yes, I think that the more stories you get out there, and the more kind of you give and create, the more chance of there is there's more of a chance of you not being utterly and totally forgotten. But yeah, we're all just a blip. There's billions of people on this world. The truth is that, I mean, none of us really matter that much in the long. Scheme of things. That's why sometimes I get really overwhelmed going to big city and just how insignificant you are, which is, to be fair, a very good reminder. And I feel the same way sometimes, like climbing a big mountain, I'm like, oh, I'm tiny. This mountain's going to be here for you know, gazillions of years compared to my blip on this radar, and like, this is okay, this is a good humbling moment totally.

11:23 And I don't even know why I feel that way, because that's why I said, it's more like you, You've had this drive to make a name for yourself and be famous, and I don't have that. I just go, I wouldn't mind living until one hundred and twenty just for this fear of being underground and nobody remembering me anymore, which is also why I kind of want to be buried and not be cremated or created. Okay, I don't. I don't know this fully about me either. I'm not sure because my issue is like my mom and dad they talk about all the time they want to be cremated, and I go, yeah, but you want like a grave because if you have no grave, then you know, at least when I walk through graveyards, I can see people's names.

12:08 So not to bring down the mood. But I had to put down a horse on Thursday, and it was really, really more traumatic than I gave myself credit for being prepared for, because it is, first of all, putting any animal down is just it's just terrible. It makes you grapple with really big questions in a really deep and painful way. And the love that we. Have for animals lives in its own bubble and it's a really challenging thing to kind of get your head around at them not being there anymore. So we had to put this horse down on Thursday. It was terrible, but the vet was really really good and he was like, you have to know that once he takes his last breath, that's not him anymore, you know, because what you have to do to bury a horse is can feel.

13:02 It's hard. You have to move the body and you have to move the body with a backo like this is not gentle and sweet and you know, like a Laura Ashley store, this is hard stuff. And he was like, know that when he takes that breath, that last breath, what you see is. No longer him, And that was very meaningful to me. Yeah, yeah, I think that would be hard for me too, especially thinking about loved ones, because we we know their spirit and we know their personalities, but we always associate it with the external, you know, the physical, the physical. Yes, yeah, yeah, totally. And I thought that that was like, that was something that was a good that was a good life lesson that I'm like still absorbing. But it really did help me in the moment there. I was like, Okay, he's not there anymore, He's he's somewhere else. And then you know, I'm driving home and my brain plays all these tricks on me, like, oh my goodness, do I feel a spirit?

14:00 Do I feel that you know? All these things that your brain just does to make you feel better about things and make it make sense, because obviously death doesn't make sense to any of us, I guess unless you're deeply deeply religious, but otherwise, like it's just all unknowns. I don't I don't think, Yeah, I don't. I don't think even if your religious death fully makes sense to anybody. But I guess, yeah, I guess. I met like like, if you're deeply religious, you're like, no, they are in heaven right now, or like no, my brother in law is in hell right now, Like can you have an assurance that I think. In if you don't have that belief system, you have less of an assurance. Yeah, I could go with that. Well, Joe, I'm only laughing because when you did the change of topic and you said, I don't mean to bring this conversation down, and then you started talking about your WRSE, I go, wait, the conversation was about me being forgotten in fifty years.

14:51 It wasn't like the most it. Was already twenty minutes of death. And I'm like, let's bring it down deeper. Let's bring it down deeper. Joe. We are so sorry because I know that that was really traumatic for you, but I'm glad that he's not in pain anymore. So if you are. At home and enjoying your beautiful summer day, or if you're at home contemplating the end of your life and what death means to all of us. Either way, you can DM us or fill out the form on our website and tell us a funnier, ridiculous, or embarrassing story. We love you, guys, We love your reviews, we love your ratings, we love seeing your downloads, and please be engaged with us because it allows us to create more content for you and if we haven't told you yet, today we love you and sweet dreams.

15:42 Thanks for listening. If you still can't sleep, why not do some shopping on the small business links at anxiety Addicts, bedtime stories dot com and support some really cool people. And don't forget to subscribe and to send us your stories. Sweet dreams, FO