July 7, 2025
Peaking At 12, Eyebrows And Haircuts. Oh My!
The inevitable awkward phase in middle school, yep, we went through it. Apparently, it builds trauma and character all at the same time. Come join us for this week's BS.
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Jo & Morgan
WEBVTT
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Good afternoon, good evening, good four am, And you woke
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up to go pee, and now you're wide awake, like
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you've had six shots of espresso, and you promise yourself
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you're not going to look at social media, but then
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you do, and now you're inundated with two big questions,
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and one is how will we ever have peace on earth?
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And two is are your eyebrows the wrong shape for
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your face? We are anxiety addicts bedtime stories.
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I'm Joe and I'm Morgan.
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Uh sorry, I have to interrupt you because what you
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just said hits like a little too close to home
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and we haven't talked about this yet. I'm really stressed
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about my eyebrows.
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And if you guys knew Morgan in high school, you
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would know how funny this was, because her eyebrows look
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very good. And in high school they kind of looked
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like apostrophes, I right, like more apostrophe like it kind
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of came in.
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Yeah, it kind of came and arched out.
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Well.
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I used to shave.
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I was because I had a unibrow, so I used
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to take the and shave down and then I don't
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even remember plucking or like I never got them wax
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because this was like back in early two thousands, I
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didn't know any of I don't know self care stuff,
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which means I must have sat forever in the bathroom
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and plucked them to be just one hair, no, one
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hair after another.
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I feel like we all did that, and I think
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we've had this conversation before, so apologies if we are repetitive.
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But it does feel like teenagers these days because they
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have access to all the information on how to not
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do gross, weird, stupid shit like they all look perfect.
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Yeah, we've talked about this. It's going to be damaging
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to their personalities. They're they're they're never going they never
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go through the awkward stage. Guys, whoever is going through
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the awkward stage, you guys will be the superior human
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come adulthood. Because I really do feel like if you
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don't go through the awkward stage, you suck as a person.
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Sorry, I completely agree, And I would say that the
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place where I really learned that was in LA and
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you could see you could see the people who had
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just been pretty their whole lives and had floated into
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LA on like a very symmetrical face and flat stomach genetics, or.
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The people who had like put in the fucking.
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Effort to be a person who was like just above
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average interesting to.
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Make it happen for themselves.
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I think this is a deep point and I think
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that we could write a book about it. You're a
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better person overall. And you know what, I haven't even
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done a trial or a testing, but I can conclusively
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say that I know this for a fact.
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Yeah, if you didn't have an awkward stage, yeah, there's
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a hole, there's a.
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Deficit in your personality.
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Totally suck.
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You suck as an adult.
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Just you're just a little bit less interesting then maybe
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a little too Kacki and Morgan then Morgan in her
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unibrow and me when everyone thought I was a boy Joe.
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I looked at my name the other day, you know,
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because we do this thing and I always try to
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find something. I literally google Morgan wallsh Northampton because if
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I just google Morgan Walsh, it's the actress that always
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comes up. And the first picture wait, let me see
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if it happens right now, The first picture in Google
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that comes up is the my seventh grade ID that
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you posted on Instagram.
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You were so cute.
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And I go, oh my god, this is the first
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picture that pops up. If anybody, I mean, no one's
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googling my name, but I was laughing so hard.
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Wait, no, I'm gonna do it right now. I mean,
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I remember making that post.
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North Oh sorry, not Northampton, Morgan Walsh, Northampton.
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There it is.
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It's the first picture that pops up, and I go, oh,
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my god, people are gonna be like my eyebrows would
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not Joe to be fair at my eyebrows were not
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the problem.
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But Morgan to be fair. With those bangs. You couldn't
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see your eyebrows, so it didn't really matter like you
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could have that.
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My mother would have seen it.
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My mother used to cut my bangs with the same scissors.
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We talk about this all the time, that she would
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go out and cut like the hedges with because they
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were like the only scissors we had. And I remember
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sitting on the bed and I would hold like a
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towel under me and she would just brush them down
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and then cut them. And then I would spend probably
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at least forty five minutes trying to puff them out
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to the perfect I.
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Would do the puff.
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I would do the puff thing too, and my arm
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would get tired, so my elbow would get down, so
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my bangs would always be this like very strong diagonal
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from upper forehead down to bottom of outside eyebrow because
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I'd like hold it like this because I was so dumb.
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We were trying so hard.
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I remember getting a haircut that I really liked once,
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which was very very.
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Infrequent for me, because.
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People didn't Everyone in the nineties had was straightening their
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hair so like, there were no curly cuts. There was
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no like, I don't know, nobody knew, or if they
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did know, they didn't know in Northampton, like how to
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deal with curly hair. So I had one haircut that
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was traumatic that I think changed my life. That I
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think is what made me into such a dynamic, interesting
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person today at almost forty two.
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Was it the poodle cut?
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Yeah, so I this is nobody else is gonna remember this,
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but people who were big fans of the original Beverly
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Hills nine oh two one oh, which used to show
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at eight pm on Wednesdays, ask me how I remember that.
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And there was this.
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Look that Kelly and oh my god, she was a
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little bit evil, but not Valerie.
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The other one had, which was the scary short wait
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wait wait, the young one she was.
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There the whole time, and yeah, that's what.
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So I brought this picture of essentially this like slicked
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back chin length, short in front cut, and I was like,
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I want to look and I'm twelve, and I was like,
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I want to look like this, because to be fair,
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I did want to look like that. And instead of
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the hairdresser going mmm, this is gonna this is gonna ruin.
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You, she was like, yeah, let's do it.
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So she did it, and obviously I don't have stick
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straight hair. It fluffed up like a horrible situation. I
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was called fro Joe for a year, which really sucked.
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I had a whole lot of other unfortunate body and
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face things going on. So I was in an all
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girls camp with Katie Siegal. It was called Camp Boy
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Casuda and I still know all the songs to Camp
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Boy Casuda. And they had a boys camp over for
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a dance.
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How stressful? Does that sound?
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Very stressful but also really like like nineteen nineties rom
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com high school movie.
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So I wore this lands End wide striped T shirt
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that I thought it was new. It was new, my
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mom got it from the catalog. I was like, this
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is I look amazing? Like I look incredible, yeah, and
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I had gap overalls, so I was, you know, and
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I was gonna be se one one of the straps
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undone because I was crisscross.
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I'm vibing with you right now, and I felt amazing.
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And my hair looked like a nineteen eighties lesbian with
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a perm right like this was very much the look
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I had, and I was I didn't know how to dance,
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and I was standing on the side of the gym
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while everybody else was dancing, and this boy came up
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to me, and he was so cute.
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He was so cute. He reminded me of Benny from
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the sand Lot.
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Like I was dying and he and I'm leaning against
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the thing and I've got my striped shirt and my like,
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you know, one done overalls, and I'm probably wearing a
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sports brat even though there is absolutely nothing there that
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needs support.
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And the hair and I have.
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These like weird teeth stains and without penciling in my eyebrows.
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Even now, I kind of look like an egg, Like
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I look like a hard boiled egg because.
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Everything's so light on my face.
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So I'm this like hard boiled egg with this like
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lesbian jew fro and he leans up on the on
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the wall right next to me, and I'm like.
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And I need and I can't breathe. And he's like
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so and I'm just like so and he just looks
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at me. He's like, girls here pretty hot, huh. And
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I was like, oh, he thinks I'm a boy.
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Oh that's actually a really funny story.
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And I died inside and I've never been the same,
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but now I have a fucking personality.
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I mean, here's the deal, guys. The lesson here is
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don't peak at twelve. Don't peak at twelve. That's that's
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what we live off of.
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So just a quick update before we sign off and say,
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sweet dreams. I am backstate side. I'm what what. I'm
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back in my hometown visiting Grandma and grandpa.
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We will be.
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Here all summer. Please continue sending in your stories. Joe
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has been on a rampage. We've gotten some really, really
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great ones and she's been writing. We're super excited for
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season three. Please don't hesitate to reach out and ask
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any questions. Let us know your story. Please remember ww
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dot anxiety aaticspdtime stories dot com. There's a contact form.
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It's very easy. Three simple sentences the beginning, middle, and end.
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And then you can listen to your very own cringe worthy, funny,
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laugh out loud bedtime story.
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Or you can slide into our DMS, and after I
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take a sleeping pell, I'll send you random messages that
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you may or may not enjoy, but I will enjoy it.
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And like, we all just got to take care of
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ourselves these days.
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And if no one's told you yet today, we love
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you guys so so much, and we will see you
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next week.
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And sweet dreams, Sweet dreams,
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